And I just couldn't believe that people couldn't see that that was better.I felt like I had an obligation to come out and tell my side of the story and hopefully people can learn from the mistakes I made.According to Madison (and some details have been echoed by other former girlfriends), the ritual would begin with them putting on matching pink flannel pajamas.

We had fun doing that."September 2017: Hefner dies at age 91 Madison has yet to break her silence on his death.

, put a rosy facade on that experience, which she shared over the course of five seasons with Hef's other girlfriends Kendra Wilkinson and Bridget Marquardt (he whittled down from seven to three for the show).

) — Hugh tied the knot with Crystal Harris in 2012. At the time of his death, they were still together and keeping a low profile.

founder who died peacefully at his home at the age of 91 on Wednesday.

While many of his famous Playmates have expressed their condolences via social media and in statements to ET -- like Kendra Wilkinson, Bridget Marquardt and Pamela Anderson -- there's one that's been noticeably silent: Holly Madison.

From 2002-2008, the platinum blond beauty was Hefner's "No. But according to Madison, all of that went downhill... In her 2015 memoir, , Madison claims she contemplated suicide due to her unhappy life in the mansion.

He revealed that the split came about six months after he told her he wasn't interested in getting married or having anymore children.

"If Holly says it’s over, I guess it’s over," Hefner, seemingly heartbroken over the split, said at the time. Until a few days ago, we were still sharing the same bed." "The fact that she was depressed after that, I didn't know at all," he added. Quite frankly, we thought when the time came, we would make a combined statement and we expected that combined statement would be somewhere in the weeks and months ahead."September 2013: Madison marries Pasquale Rotella Despite saying in a 2009 interview that she was "never dating anyone again" -- "I don't need a man. It's just weird how someone can get away with such a thing."Summer 2016: The feud continues Nearly a year after the release of Madison's tell-all, Wilkinson said in an interview with Sirius XM satellite radio's with Evan Cohen and Mike Babchik that she was still on Hefner's side.

"There were chunks of my life when I was married, and when I was married I never cheated," he has said. You have to keep your hand in." Hugh with Kendra Wilkinson, Bridget Marquardt, and Holly Madison.