They get offended when you imply that they're anything but nice -- because that means you're beginning to figure them out. You'll flirtily throw in a little “Wow, you're mean” or “You're being a d*ck," but he takes it too seriously. He sure has something to say about the places you like to go and the outfits you wear, but he won't shy away from joining you at those places and taking off those clothes.“I love it when you wear black,” he says when you're wearing white.“You're funny when you're angry," he tells you. The bartender sure loves him, but you're not quite sure if you do.

He doesn't get the joke and responds with “How am I being mean? ”(This is gaslighting: He tears you down gradually -- insidiously -- and denies it when you point it out.)All he hears is something he's heard before. This thing you have is just starting, and you're feeling good about it.

You're evoking a defensive response in him for a reason. You want to push it in the right direction, because you like this guy and want him to stick around.

You’re doomed to forever be in an unsatisfactory relationship with someone who loves their friends a lot more than you and who’ll never introduce you to their family because you’re ‘too aggressive’.

But then you start dating someone who is a genuinely nice person.

And I don’t mean nice in the wishy-washy, personality-less meaning of the word.

I’m talking about the kind of person who brings you a glass of water every night without fail. They're the ones who think doing one nice thing lets them off the hook for being an assh*le. You're picking up on clues that indicate he's not this sweet guy you once thought he was. But as soon as the bartender comes over, this guy is all kinds of chatty. But you've been trying to pull conversation from this guy all night. They're the ones who always SAY that they're nice -- but act the opposite. They seem to have friends, but they're often alone. He's Here's how to tell if the guy you're dating is a fake nice guy. Compliments are meant to make you feel good about yourself -- not second-guess yourself. It's hard to get this guy to have a good, deep conversation.The kind of person who goes down on you without expecting a BJ in return.The kind of person who’ll go to vegan restaurants with you even if their favourite food is ribs.He's keeping you where he wants you and thinks that's totally fine. When you're not willing to do what he wants to, it's your fault.